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Written by Elisa Guest

I woke up one December morning and realized I felt I was in a failing relationship with Pole.
After 6 years- full of triumphs and fails; progress and regress; of shows and parties and injuries and set backs- the excitement wasn’t as strong. The lifelong commitment wasn’t so clear.
It felt as Pole, my partner, had changed. The style had changed. The tricks had changed. The newer dancers were coming in stronger, hungrier, progressing quicker. They kept coming younger. I was getting older.
I wasn’t changing.
Dealing with injuries and set backs, work and family obligations, I had not only failed to keep up with the changes, I had been trying to hang on to Pole as I knew it! The harder I fought the changes, the more frustrating I became. The more frustrating Pole became.
And now, here I was, considering if I should be grateful for the time shared and move on….. or….
How could I save my relationship to Pole?
Because at the bottom of my heart and soul, I wasn’t ready to give it up! I couldn’t walk away.
Pole was never just an exercise. Never just a fad. It was a lifestyle, a community, a therapy, a creative expression, a journey of learning about myself!
And then, a few days later it hit me. Just as with a real partner- and everything’s fine everyone in life- it’s best to relate to things and people as they are.
Not as we wish them to be. Not as they used to be.
I made that my New Year Vow.
With this new outlook, I have re found my passion and drive in Pole. I’m back to having fun and learning! I’m back to fully enjoying all that Pole offers.
Because in relating to it as it is, I realized I don’t have to follow all the changes, I just have to find how and where I fit among them!

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United Pole Artists Pole News is a place where news from around the world regarding pole dancing is shared.  UPA and UPA Bloggers write and/or gather news and stories for you so you don’t miss a thing. Let us know your thoughts on these stories or submit your own UPA Story. We would love to hear from you!

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