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Written by: Crimson Minxxx

Once we begin our pole journey, the way we relate to others is forever changed. Spending time in class and in the pole community helps forge empowering, meaningful friendships—creating bona fide pole gangs—and when we roll with our gang, life is a bit different. Sometimes, our “civilian” friends just can’t relate. We have our own language, less inhibitions, and a unique concept of social norms. This is why I’m throwing a party exclusively for pole dancers… because I love us (more on that later.) But first, let’s break it on down: what happens when we party with our pole gang?

  1. Pants are optional

PoleParlour_ParlourPlay-01 It’s no secret: pole dancers hate pants. We’ll settle for leggings, but we’ve become so accustomed to wearing stretchy bikini bottoms when we pole, that we start to question why this level of comfort shouldn’t extend to other areas of our lives. Hell, I would work, grocery shop, and go to dinner at grandma’s in my pole bottoms if deemed socially acceptable. Unfortunately, this is not the case, but social norms DO allow this when we’re exclusively with our pole gang. So take advantage and rip off those leg cages!


2. Shirts are optional, too.


See number 1, and apply to above the waist.


  1. You Can Dance Dirty Without the Dirty Looks


As pole dancers, we’ve learned to embrace our sensuality and enjoy moving freely when we hear a hot jam. Sometimes this translates to booty shaking to Beyoncé at the dentist’s office, or hair whipping to Def Leppard at a bar mitzvah. In any case, many people find this behavior shocking. But not your pole gang! They’ll be right there with you, offering up some ass slaps to show their appreciation.



  1. Spready Photos Are a Must


Try asking someone outside of the pole community to define a spready, and you’ll probably receive some creative but inaccurate responses (thanks Ozzy Man for the lexicon!) But us polers know what it means. A spready is something we work tirelessly doing painful stretching and flexibility training to achieve. And when we get our spready, our social media followers will KNOW IT. Favorite spready photo locals include Bondi Beach, in front of a graffiti wall, and out at night with a cocktail in one hand, and a leg stretched high in the other. And when you’re with your pole gang, they understand, and will happily snap that photo for you to proudly post on Instagram.


  1. You Can Carb Load For the Next Day’s Class


Pole training is intense. Your pole gang knows this. So there is a basic understanding that an extra bread basket with dinner is completely acceptable. We need the fuel to flip, spin, and strut our stuff in class tomorrow!



  1. You Can Rock Your Skankiest Outfit Without Judgment


After poling with your gang for months (and even years!) in nothing more than little bottoms and a sporty bra top, anything you choose to wear is going to seem prudish by comparison. Partying with your pole gang is the perfect opportunity to confidently rock that cute mini dress or sexy crop top that’s been sitting in your closet, begging to be worn! Plus, you’ll have exposed skin grip for number 7…


  1. Someone is Always Up for Inappropriate Acrobatics


Did you see that lamp post?! Ceiling beam?! Empty stage?! Railing?! Someone will definitely hang from/swing from/handstand on that with you.


  1. Cocktail-Induced Pole Ramblings Aren’t Met With Blank Stares


Why is it that after a couple of margaritas, pole dancers want nothing more than to talk about that pole trick they just nailed? Or a freestyle video they saw online? Or the next pair of stripper heels they want to purchase, or that funny pole meme they saw on Facebook? Well, if you ain’t with your pole gang, they ain’t gonna get it. Which is why it’s so fun to party with other polers: not only will they get it, they’ll share your excitement! And will also most likely start shamelessly scrolling through their phone to share their latest obsessions, as well.


  1. You Know the Squad’s Got Your Back


Pole is thicker than water! You mess with one of us, you mess with all of us. When you party with your pole gang, you know the squad’s got your back, and that you’re going to have a one helluva an evening!

We love our “civilian” friends, but our bond with our pole gang is priceless. And so often, our only opportunity to get everyone together in a private space is at performances and competitions. Which are fantastic and fun to attend, but they aren’t necessarily conducive to mingling and letting loose! Hence, the inspiration to create Parlour Play. Parlour Play is a non-pole event for pole dancers happening in Hollywood, California on Friday, May 27, 2016! We’ll be doing mini workshops, dance-offs, a costume contest, and freeplay throughout the evening… all with some pumpin’ tunes, an open bar, lots of sinful desserts, a photo booth, and more! And since there won’t be actual poles at the event, you can lotion up and show your gang what those legs look like when they aren’t ashy!

It’s my hope that through this event, we can connect and boogie down with other pole babes and dudes from the community in a celebratory, non-competitive environment. And in solidarity with pole gangs, there are special group rates available if you want to round up your closest pole comrades and attend the party together! Learn more at And even if you can’t make it out to the event, I hope this post inspired you to appreciate your pole gang and enjoy the time you have with each other off the pole as much as you do on the pole!

Lots of Love, Giggles, Hip Wiggles & Booty Jiggles,

Crimson Minxxx

Instagram: @PoleParlour


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